It’s Time to Pull The Plug on Brodus Clay

Ladies and Gentlemen I am here to tell you that funk is not on a roll. I really did think that I would enjoy this character for a lot longer than I have but the fact remains that the Funkasaurus has to go. Not Brodus Clay, but definately this dancing fool who brings children into the ring post match ala the Junkyard Dog. Please allow me to explain:

I had high hopes for Brodus. When I saw him on NXT I liked the fact that he had a different look, with the mohawk and rotund body type. His talking didn’t impress me but it didn’t offend me either, just average I thought. I really thought it was a shame, at the time, that he lost to cookie cutter “where is he now?” Johnny Curtis. I say at the time because in hindsight, winning NXT has meant nothing for anyone outside of kicking off Nexus for Wade Barrett.

I was not a fan of having Brodus be the bodygaurd for Alberto Del Rio. Don’t get me wrong, I think a bodygaurd role for Brodus would have been perfect but the choice of Alberto Del Rio just didn’t fit with Brodus. Here you had a giant guy with tatoos and a mohawk paired with the aristocratic Del Rio. The dynamic didn’t work and the chemistry just wasn’t there.  Another thing that I thought hurt Brodus at the time was the fact that he was put into somewhat high profile Smackdown matches, teaming with Alberto against Edge and Christian. I say hurt because it both exposed Brodus’ limitations in the ring and also had him taking the pins in these matches. Not exactly the best way to kick start a monster.

Which brings me to the next time I saw Brodus. Mo and I attended a Smackdown taping here in Calgary in late August (**shill mode, full audio recap of that show HERE) and Brodus worked a Superstars match. This had been no surprise as Brodus had been squashing jobbers on the wwe.com’s Superstars shows for weeks. I was impressed by the way the character was portrayed. It was obvious that Brodus was never going to be mistaken for Daniel Bryan or Lou Thesz but he had a good killer heel intensity about him.  So when they continued to have him squash jobbers on the online show I had no problem with that.

Then one week on RAW there were vingettes promoting Brodus’ “debut” and I was excited for this chance to see more of what I saw at the Superstars tapings. Then there became a question as to whether or not this debut was going to happen and it was turned into a storyline.  On January 9th, 2012, after weeks of delay, I was anxiously awaiting Brodus’ debut. A monster to be built up against the likes of CM Punk, John Cena, and even the Undertaker. Imagine my surprise when Ernest “The Cat” Miller’s music began to play.

 SOMEBODY CALL MY MOMMA!

And I continue to be in shock as cross between King Kong Bundy and Flash Funk appears on my television. What the FUNK, I thought. But soon after this bewilderment, I began to smile. The song and the act was very infectious. So much so that I became a Brodus fan. I figured that if he could squash lower level talents like Curt Hawkins, JTG, Tyler Reks etc. once every two weeks.

Well this is 2012, and there is no such thing as every couple of weeks in the WWE so Brodus was fed the low level talents week after week. The problem with the Funkasaurus squashing guys versus The Monster Brodus Clay squashing jobbers was all in the presentation. Monster Clay looked fierce and dominant while Funkasaurus was smiling and having fun throwing guys around, and in a very “clunky” manner I might add. This was evident to Vince McMahon as there was fear that Brodus would hurt someone and so Vince, not wanting to call someone’s Momma, took him off TV. This wasn’t the worst of timing as WWE was well on the road to Wrestlemania and had enough Television time filled anyway.

Wrestlemania would be the next time I saw Brodus and this is where I began to turn on the character. Brodus was out on stage with his “Momma” and 30 of her closest dancing friends. It seemed over the top but it WAS Wrestlemania afterall, and if you are ever going to go over the top (without Slyvester Stallone that is) Wrestlemania is the time and the place.

WWE has tried since Wrestlemania to get Brodus to the mid card level but it just hasn’t clicked. His matches against Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger, and most recently The Miz have all failed to impress anyone. His short lived pairing with Hornswoggle (see what I just did there?) was painful and thankfully appears to be done with for good.

The WWE needed a monster and instead they gave us a dancing side show act. The fact that they tried to push him up the card, even with Hornswoggle, shows that they are not in touch with what the audience is wanting out of a big man. We needed the One Man Gang and got Akeem.

It’s a shame for George Murdoch, the man behind the mohawk, but a repackage definately needs to be in his future. My only fear is that the “Larger Than Life” character that is The Funkasaurus will be too much for him to leave behind. Even Tensai got Albert chants at one point and that character was years ago. Brodus definately has the look and size but does need to be off TV, in FCW and on the road, working to improve. A bodyguard role for someone more suitable than Del Rio might be a good idea for him come the fall. Maybe WWE can get their production team to make it seem like a meteor hits the ring during one of his matches because

THE FUNKASAURUS NEEDS TO BE EXTINCT!!

Agree or disagree? I’d love to hear your thoughts! You can shoot me an email at addie@wetalkwrestling.com I’m always interested in what people think about anything, past or present, in wrestling!